Cow Economics II

SOCIALISM

You have two cows. The government nationalizes both cows but still allows you to sell milk.

COMMUNISM

You have two cows. The government takes both and gives you spoiled milk.

FASCISM

You have two cows. The government takes one away and presses it into military service.

NAZISM

You have two cows. The government takes one away and shoots it for having a large nose and dark spots.

TRIBALISM

You have two cows. Your neighbors take both cows and shoot you.

REDISTRIBUTIONISM

You have two cows. Everyone should have the same amount of cow. The government takes both cows, cuts them up, and spends more than the cows are worth giving everyone a little piece of cow.

WELFAREISM (REDISTRIBUTIONISM REVISITED)

You have two cows. The government takes one to give to someone else who doesn't know how to milk it.

BUREAUCRACY

You have two cows. The government takes both, loses one while moving it to a farm in Puerto Rico and forgets to milk the other.

LIBERTARIANISM

You have two cows. You let them do what they want.

CAPITALISM

You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

REAGANOMICS

You have two cows. You sell one, buy a bull. You take out a huge loan on the cow, and ignore both the cow and the loan from that point on. Then, you try to milk the bull and blame the Japanese for its lack of production.

CONSERVATISM

You have two cows. They pray in school every day.

LIBERALISM

You have two cows. You don't worry that they sleep together.

PROTECTIONISM

You have two cows. You can't buy a bull from another country.

PEROTISM

You have two cows. You aren't allowed to sell the milk to Mexicans.

HILLARYISM

You have two cows. Everyone should have a cow from the government, even if they don't want a cow.

CLINTONISM

You have two cows. The president can't decide what he wants to do about it.